Calm after the storm
by moonlight08
Summary: *Spoilers* for Mockingjay. Pre-epilogue. Just wanted to get the story out of my head. Read and review!
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer. I do NOT own The Hunger Games series. *Sniff***

******SPOLIER ALERT!**** for Mockingjay.  
**

_Prim looked at me with her big, sincere eyes wide open. She was scared. I try to run to her, even though I know it's too late. The parachute explodes. Again. And then I feel the fire, slowly swallowing my body , but I'm too shocked to actually process that my skin is on fire . Because, the truth is, the worst kind of pain isn't physical._

As soon as I open my eyes and sit, reality hits me like a bucket of cold water, like every single night since Prim died. She wasn't coming back, and it was my fault.

Lately the nightmares had been getting worse: more dead children, Peeta being tortured and Prim exploding were the worst, and I usually woke up with a sore throat and covered in sweat.

Yeah, this was just like any other night.

But then the door opened.

I didn't even bother to look. I knew who it was, even before he spoke.

"Katniss?" he whispered softly as he closed the space in between. I could barely see him, as my eyes were filled with unshed tears. "I could hear you scream. I was worried."

We spent a moment of silence.

"She's not coming back, Peeta." he carefully sat down beside me on the bed, caressing my cheek for comfort.

"I know." was all he said. But I heard what he couldn't tell me. Because we both knew it wasn't going to be okay. We were broken beyond repair.

"I'm sorry." I apologised after a long pause. I was sorry for so many things. It would be a never-ending list of apologies, because if it weren't for me, nothing would have happened.

He pulled me in for a tight hug. Right then I realised how much I really missed him.

"It wasn't your fault. Stop torturing yourself."

Oh, but it was my fault and we knew it. But I let him comfort me for what felt like hours. And when he thought I was asleep and stood up to leave, I grabbed him by the wrist and asked him to stay.

And he didn't say no.


	2. Survive

Peeta and I grew back together, as he kept coming every single night since that day. It was a silent agreement we had made, because we both knew we needed each other to survive.

Survive. That was the best word to describe what we did. We could hardly call it by any other name: we struggled to keep our minds from thinking about our recent losses, because if we didn't, the pain scattered the pieces that we'd somehow glued back together. But sometimes that wasn't enough. He still had to hold on to the back of a chair until the contaminated flashbacks were over. I would sometimes wake up screaming in the middle of the night, after the nightmares that haunted me since my sister died. But we were fine. We survived. Together.

Peeta's flashbacks started to come fewer and far between. Even if he still had nightmares. And, after a few months, I could speak to Peeta as I normally would have, without triggering one of his episodes. It was a relief to see that he was improving, little by little but steadily.

One night, a few months after we returned to 12, as I sat on my bed, I heard Peeta call my name. Usually, it wouldn't be anything special, but there was something different in the way he said my name that sent chills through my spine. However, I couldn't identify exactly what had changed. And then it hit me.

It was the voice he used to use when he was talking to me. It was the voice of the boy with the bread. And it could only mean one thing: he was back.

"Katniss?" he whispered. He was now right in front of me, looking directly into my eyes. I had been so deep in thought that I hadn't even noticed he had come into the room. Our room. But suddenly his hands were in my shoulders. "I remembered something today." he said, and he seemed happy "I remembered the first time I saw. The day you sang that song at school. I could remember everything: what I saw, what I felt, what I heard. They couldn't use that memory against me, and it came back." he was smiling now, and I was surprised to find that I was, too. "Katniss," he suddenly very serious "I remember the day I fell in love with you." he stroked my cheek softly, enjoying the moment "But I still need to know something." there was a pause, his eyes smoldering "You love me: real or not real?"

I didn't even hesitate this time.

"Real."

He smiled before leaning in to kiss me. No camera, no audience. Just us.

And I liked it.


End file.
